Mental health in relation to dating violence is often discussed as a consequence of dating violence, with many jumping into action retroactively: “What mental health supports can be put in place after someone experiences harm?” This is important because, according to the CDC, for teens, the long-term impact of dating violence can look like thoughts of suicide, exhibiting anti-social behaviors, and symptoms of depression and anxiety. To create a violence-free world, the focus on mental health also needs to happen before dating violence ever occurs. Addressing negative mental health experiences can also stop teens from experiencing or perpetrating dating violence.
The Teen Mental Health Crisis in the United States
According to the CDC’s 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, around 2 out of 5 high school students reported feeling persistently sad or hopeless. Despite a slight decrease from 2021 to 2023, teens’ negative mental health experiences have been continually increasing over the past decade. For female and LGBTQ+ students, the feelings are more widespread, with 53% of female students and 65% of LGBTQ+ students reporting persistent sadness or hopelessness. These trends are paralleled by serious thoughts or attempts at suicide. In general, 1 in 10 high school students reported struggling with suicidal thoughts and behaviors, but that increases for female students, 13%, and LGBTQIA+ students, 20%.
Experiences of increased mental health issues aren’t exclusive to the school setting. According to the US Surgeon General’s Advisory on Social Media and Youth Mental Health, on average, teens spend 3.5 hours a day on social media. This becomes a concern because spending 3 hours or more a day on social media doubles the risk factor of poor mental health experiences, such as poor sleep and symptoms of depression and anxiety. Extensive social media use also increases the risk of body dissatisfaction, disordered eating, social comparisons, and low self-esteem, with 46% of 13-17-year-olds surveyed saying social media made them feel worse.
In addition to increasing negative feelings of the self, there is also an abundance of violent and hateful content. There is currently increased access to self-harm and suicide content across social media. According to the US Surgeon General’s report, studies indicate that showing and accessing self-harm and suicide walkthrough content can provide a normalization of these behaviors, increasing viewers’ likelihood to participate. In addition to teaching youth how to harm themselves, about 2 in 3 teens are exposed to hate-based content. Some research indicates that seeing or experiencing violence and hate online increases anxiety, depression, and stress disorders, and can desensitize people to the harm. Social media is pervasive and designed so the average user, including teenagers exploring community, identity, and growing up, can’t turn it off or put it down, creating a cycle of increased negative mental health outcomes.
How Teen Mental Health Relates to Preventing Dating Violence
Adverse mental health experiences are considered risk factors for dating violence. In other words, poor mental health can increase the risk of experiencing or perpetrating harm. Negative mental health experiences can lead to lower self-esteem, struggles with conflict resolution, barriers to emotional regulation, obstacles to trust building, and increased risky behaviors. This might look like increased rule-breaking, substance use, increased aggression and violence, and other health-compromising behaviors. All of these risks show up in two main forms of dating violence for teens: Someone being harmed or someone causing harm.
how teen mental health can impact the risk of Being Harmed
In dating relationships, partners generally know more intimate and private details about each other, including what might be happening with their mental health. In attempts to gain or maintain control within relations, a partner may use information, diagnoses, or mental health symptoms to hurt their partners in obvious or subtle ways. In more overt ways, this looks like:
- taking, withholding, or hiding medication;
- threatening to tell people about diagnoses;
- preventing someone from going to mental health professionals; or
- encouraging someone to harm themselves.
In more subtle ways, it might look like:
- supporting anxieties that nobody likes them,
- belittling to keep self-esteem low, or
- convincing them that the only reason they are still alive is because of their partner, so they can never leave.
A partner who wants to harm and be in control might use a potential increase in risky behavior as a tool to harm. This could look like supporting rule-breaking to isolate a young person from parents, guardians, or school resources because they’re now a “difficult kid” who can only trust their partner. In 2023, the CDC found that teens struggling with depressive episodes were more likely to self-medicate or engage in the risky behavior of substance use than their peers. A partner who causes harm could be the supplier of drugs and alcohol. In both examples, rule-breaking and substance use, a partner who abuses can use these as a tool to threaten family, school, or legal consequences if they don’t get what they want.
There are endless ways that someone who wants to harm their partner might exploit someone’s negative mental health experiences. Being aware helps find ways to stop it.
how teen mental health can impact the risk of Causing Harm
On the flip side of mental health being exploited to cause harm, mental health can also exacerbate unhealthy and unsafe behaviors from someone at risk of perpetrating harm. This might show up as:
- Emotional dysregulation with angry and/or violent outbursts when they don’t know how to process their emotions.
- Distrust or paranoia in dating relationships that may lead to jealousy, control, and dominance.
- Struggles addressing conflict without violence, silence, shame, manipulation, or other unsafe means for navigating conflict.
Additionally, participating in risky behaviors also has its own dangers for teens perpetrating harm in dating relationships. Violence and aggression can become the normal and/or “go to” response, which can lead to physical, mental, and emotional harm. For a teen who may be self-medicating with substances like illegal drugs, opioids, alcohol, and more, it can cause impaired decision-making and impulsivity, which may increase the risk of unsafe behaviors in their relationship. This might look like:
- allowing aggression or impulsivity to guide their emotional response,
- putting their partner in a dangerous situation, or
- making choices that ignore a partner’s consent because, in the moment, it feels exciting, fun, or right.
The goal of addressing risk factors is to stop the violence from happening in the first place. A risk factor like negative mental health experiences is not the sole cause of dating violence. Even if a teen is struggling with mental health issues, if they cause violence and harm in their relationship, they are still accountable and responsible for that.
How to prevent dating violence by supporting mental health
There is a teen mental health crisis, and negative mental health experiences can increase the risk of experiencing or perpetrating dating violence. This is a big and heavy problem. It’s normal to feel like nothing can be done. Fortunately, there are steps we can all take today, over time, and across our communities to build a world where teens get support for their mental health and violence decreases.
How to Prevent Dating Violence by Supporting Mental Health as individuals
As individuals and within our own relationships, we can:
- Talk to teens about mental health
- Create space for young people to openly and safely share their struggles
- Educate teens on how to feel and process big emotions
- Teach teens the risk of increased social media use
- Help teens build healthy social media and tech habits, like screen limits and no phones in bed
- Practice safe conflict resolution
How to Prevent Dating Violence by Supporting Mental Health Within Communities
Within our community, we can:
- Explore mental health resources in the community
- Identify where there are mental health resource gaps
- Create community-led spaces and safety nets for teens struggling
- Talk to school and community leaders about increasing resources for teens’ mental health
How to Prevent Dating Violence By Supporting Mental Health as a Society
As a society, we can also:
- Destigmatize mental health and ask for help
- Connect with elected officials to increase resources for mental health support and professionals
- Advocate for social media company transparency around safety features and accountability related to bullying, violence, and hate
There is no single solution to the teen mental health crisis. Progress will take time, energy, and sustained investment, but by working together, meaningful and lasting change is within reach.
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