Teen Dating Violence

In Nebraska, sexual and intimate partner violence peaks between the ages of 15 and 18. Teen dating violence is just as serious as any other form of intimate partner violence. It can have profound and long-lasting impacts on survivors, their loved ones, and their community. Fortunately, it’s also preventable.

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Jump to: Teen Dating Violence is Intimate Partner Violence | Gender & Teen Dating Violence | Technology & Teen Dating Violence | Preventing Teen Dating Violence | What to do if You’re Experiencing Teen Dating Violence | Supporting Survivors of Teen Dating Violence

Teen dating violence is intimate partner violence

Teen dating violence is a form of intimate partner violence. It can include:

  • Psychological aggression
  • Stalking
  • Physical violence
  • Sexual violence

Data from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s 2019 Youth Risk Behavior Survey indicates that among U.S. high school students who reported dating during the 12 months before the survey:

  • About 1 in 12 experienced physical dating violence.
  • About 1 in 12 experience sexual dating violence.

Teen dating violencecan take place in person, online, or through technology.

Gender & Teen Dating Violence

Both males and females experience and perpetrate teen dating violence. Often, teens report that both partners committed aggressive acts during the relationship. However, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, young females experience higher rates of physical and sexual dating violence than young males. In Nebraska, women encounter intimate partner and sexual violence earlier in life than men. The teenage years are the most dangerous time for women, who are at peak likelihood for first experiencing all forms of violence. 

  • 1-in-3 of women in Nebraska face unwanted sexual contact for the first time between ages 11 and 19
  • 17 years of age is the most common age for a Nebraska woman’s initial experience of rape through force.
  • 1-in-5 of women in Nebraska experience physical violence from an intimate partner for the first time between the ages of 11 and 19

Teen dating violence doesn’t just occur in heterosexual relationships. Students who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or queer or those who are unsure of their gender identity experience higher rates of physical and sexual dating violence compared to students who identify as heterosexual, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Technology & Teen Dating Violence

Technology plays a significant role in teen dating violence. Digital dating abuse is the use of technologies such as texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate a partner. Technology abuse is a common tactic within the context of teen dating violence. According to the Safety Net Project, technology abuse can include:

  • Constantly texting or calling, sending threats, or demanding info
  • Controlling who someone can connect with online
  • Forcing someone to share passwords or locations
  • Threatening to share fake or private pictures or content
  • Forcing someone to participate in humiliating online activities
  • Pressuring someone to change their online profile information
  • Making jealous comments about likes, or pictures on social media

However, technology can also be a powerful tool for positivity in teens’ lives when used in constructive ways. By focusing on building connections and establishing trust, it is possible to empower teens to make informed decisions around tech use. For more information and tips for getting started, visit Safety Net Project’s Teens and Technology: Safety, Privacy, and Empowerment resource. 

Preventing Teen Dating Violence

The good new is that teen dating violence is preventable. It is important to introduce prevention strategies to youth before adolescence. Supporting healthy, nonviolent relationships could reduce teen dating violence. During the pre-teen and teen years, youth should begin learning skills to create and maintain healthy relationships, including managing feelings and communicating in a healthy way.

There are many prevention programs and curriculum available, including:

  • Dating Matters is a comprehensive prevention model that teaches 11–14-year-olds how to have healthy, safe relationships both now and in the future.
  • Safe Dates is an effective prevention program for middle and high school students designed to stop or prevent dating violence perpetration and victimization. 
  • For more evidence-based programs, visit CrimeSolutions.gov and search “teen dating violence.”
Preventing Violence

What To Do If You Are Experiencing Dating Violence

Dating violence can happen to anyone, and it is never your fault. If you or a friend is in an unhealthy or abusive relationship, here’s what you can do:

  • Recognize the Warning Signs: Controlling behavior, jealousy, isolation from friends, threats, or physical violence are all signs of an unhealthy relationship.
  • Talk to Someone You Trust: A parent, teacher, coach, or school counselor can help provide guidance and support. You do not have to go through this alone.
  • Create a Safety Plan: If you’re worried about your safety, identify safe places to go, have a code word with friends or family, and consider changing class schedules or routes home if necessary. You can use the Domestic Violence Hotline’s interactive guide to create a personalized safety plan. 
  • Avoid Confronting the Abuser Alone: Breaking up with an abusive partner can be dangerous. If possible, end the relationship in a public place or with a trusted friend nearby.
  • Use Technology Safely: Be mindful of social media privacy settings, location sharing, and who has access to your phone or passwords.
  • Contact a Hotline for Help:  Advocates at your local survivor support organization offer free and confidential help locally, and Love Is Respect is a national organization that specializes in supporting teens and young adults experiencing relationship abuse.
  • Know That You Deserve Respect: No one has the right to control, threaten, or harm you in a relationship. Healthy relationships are based on trust, respect, and equality.

Supporting Survivors of Teen Dating Violence

Dating abuse is difficult for everyone involved, including people who attempt to offer support. Those who haven’t dealt with dating violence before sometimes wonder why survivors don’t just leave their partner. There may be any number of reasons why people stay in abusive relationships. Beyond just understanding and recognizing the warning signs of abuse, one of the simplest ways to support survivors is to understand the complexities of why they may not be able to leave, including:

  • Conflicting emotions, such as fear of what will happen, belief that abuse is normal, fear of being outed, shame, low self-esteem, or love.
  • Pressure, including social or peer pressure, cultural or religious settings, pregnancy or parenting.
  • Distrust of authority, such as adults not taking young people seriously, fear or distrust of law enforcement, or barriers to institutional support.
  • Dependency, such as financial dependency, lack of support, or physical dependency.

If you’re ready to help someone affected by dating violence in your life, Love is Respect offers resources based on your relationship to the survivor.

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